The experience is enough

A few weeks ago I attended All Day Hey, a friendly one-day single-track conference in Leeds, UK. I attended with a group of very solid Internet Friends™️, most of whom I was meeting In Real Life for the first time.

I have attended many conferences over the last few years, but usually I am attending because I am a speaker. All Day Hey is the only conference I can remember deliberately attending as a non-speaker back in 2023, and now 2025. It can be difficult to justify attending a conference purely for the sake of attending, on both personal and professional grounds. We all know there isn't enough time in the day to do what we need to do: exercise, eat well, get enough sleep, do the food shopping, spend quality time with your loved ones; and work deadlines are always looming. But taking time away from your desk and your Internet Machine can make a profound impact on your professional and personal spirits.

In this doom-riddled capitalist world, we are too preoccupied with metrics. This is through no fault of our own. If we are constantly tasked with making the needle go up in our professional endeavours, it seems only natural that we would apply this default thinking to other areas of life. In considering whether to attend a conference, you might ask yourself:

• What if I don't make any new professional connections?

• What if I don't learn anything new from the talks to take back to work?

• What if my boss thinks it's a waste of time?

Truthfully, you might not make any new professional connections, although you may meet people with whom you have existing relationships, and you might not learn anything new from any of the talks. But attending a conference is certainly not a waste of time, especially considering the wider impact it may have on you as a full and complete human being.

We should be treating attending a conference as an experience first and foremost. Experiences shape us; they shape our attitudes, our opinions, and our approaches to all things, whether personal or professional. The experience of being in a room of like-minded people for a day can be energising. Hallway conversations centred on shared interests can be refreshing. The raw buzz of being in the same place as lots of people you know from On The Internet™️ can be very exciting. You just cannot replicate this from behind your Internet Machine in your office, especially if it's at your home. Meeting people In Real Life is an experience that should be cherished for the experience itself, regardless of the circumstances or outcomes.

I must admit that for a few years I was reluctant to attend conferences purely for the sake of the experience, and I was guilty of using all of the excuses laid out in the bullet points above. I would whisper naïvely to myself: "Surely, I can do all this networking and learning from the comfort of my own home. I don't need to waste time travelling to a venue." But something about this experience I shared on a beautifully sunny day in Leeds with my Internet Friends has changed something within me.

Surround yourself with people who add value to your life. Who challenges you to be greater than you were yesterday? Who sprinkles magic into your existence, just like you do to theirs? Life isn’t meant to be done alone. Find your tribe, and journey freely and loyally together. – Alexandra Elle, author

I have always been a bit of a self-categorised "outsider". I feel that I don't often fit in at social events in the real world that aren't centred on technology or music (or anywhere else, really). But what I realise now is that I spent so long hiding myself away from the Real World in my home office that I forgot that there is a community of people in the world where I do fit in; one that has welcomed me with open arms, laughs at my jokes, appreciates and shares my work, and wants me to succeed. And all of this has occurred in the Real World, not behind a screen.

I've always felt I belonged to a tribe on The Internet, which has been facilitated somewhat by the strange phenomenon of the Social Media Networks™️ that I have used to share knowledge and education as part of my job. But sharing a day in the Real World with the tribe, speaking and hearing real words with each other, and sharing food together, has promoted this blessed group to a collection of real friends and professional allies.

Did I make any new professional connections at All Day Hey? Yes. Meeting smart people who I knew of but didn't know, really, has strengthened my professional network and capacity to reach more people in my work as a developer educator. Did I learn anything new from the talks at All Day Hey? Not quite, but I was inspired to think more creatively about alt text by Lola Odelola, and the tribe bonded deeply over her ideas. Did my boss think it was a waste of time? I haven't asked him.

And did I enjoy the experience? Yes, absolutely. The experience was enough: and more.

View all official 2025 photos by All Day Hey | last photo by Robb Owen